Category Archives: Completed Nudge

Nudged: De-pill a sweater

Leave a reply

Backstory: Oh, geez. This must have been added to the list in a moment of frustration, not because I felt it was going to nudge me into any greater awareness or move me closer to finding My Purpose in Life, but simply because I am sick of how things pile up.

Two of my favorite sweaters have been in a box under my desk for…well, at least a year. Next to them is a pile of clothing that needs mending, next to a box of writing exercises and short story ideas, next to a yoga mat (covered in dust)…. How does this happen? This space should be my work space, my creating space. Instead, I look around this room and am eternally distracted.

And so this week, I start small with one task that I hope will make a small difference.

What Happened: It took less than an hour to de-pill both sweaters. One went on my body (better than shopping), the other went into the closet. The de-pilling machine (oh, how I love that gadget), went into the box where I keep mending supplies.

My nicely organized–and de-pilled–sweaters.

…and in there I discovered an old, unfinished cross-stitch project that had been tucked away, possibly nine years ago when I first moved into this home. Maybe it’s time to bring that back out and re-stretch the muscles that used to love creating beauty through needlework?

How cute would this look in my kitchen?

The Ah-Hah: It’s scary to open up the tucked away box or even the door to the closet into which you’ve stuffed stuff for far too long. But I’m finding that once I dive in, I find some treasures. Some things get handed off to others who might appreciate them (see my earlier post about sharing favorite books from childhood), some things go to Goodwill where someone who really needs them might find them. Somethings reopen pleasures and passions, such as the cross-stitch project so long neglected.

What’s lurking in your closet/drawer/basement/storage unit?

 

P.S. As I mentioned in the Nudging post for this, I did take time to step away from the Thanksgiving festivities for some quiet reflection. Here are some of the things on my Gratitude List:

  • 52Nudges readers who inspire and motivate me to keep nudging.
  • The marvelous two-story tall poinsettia plant outside my office window that delights me by re-blooming every November.
  • The arrival of the first early-bird holiday card. (You know who you are—and you know how much I love hearing from you! Mine is coming soon!)
  • That delicious autumny nip in the air that says “perfect weather for a long walk.”
  • A brain that is still hungry to grow, open to change, up to a challenge, and curious about so many things.

 

 

 

Nudged: Buy a lottery ticket

Leave a reply

Backstory: I’m thinking over all my “rules” for Nudges, and I’m not sure this is legit. 🙂 Certainly this will be inexpensive and the task can be completed within the one-week time frame. But does it nudge me out of my comfort zone? We’ll see.

What Happened: I am more likely to buy a lottery ticket to slip into a card for a friend than purchase one for myself, so I perhaps that counts as getting out of my comfort zone. Yeah. No. That’s pretty weak. 😉

I put off completing this Nudge till Thursday night, after several packed and challenging days of work. Although it was only a block to the store, afterward I treated myself to a short walk around the neighborhood (yes, in my mask) and took in the sunset, cleared my head a bit.

As I walked, I allowed myself to daydream about how I might spend my BIG WINNINGS! Here are some of the things on my list:

  • “Hire” my sister and my friends so they can each take a year off work to rest or dream or figure out what they want to do with their lives, then do it
  • Gift each of my nieces and nephews and godsons with a travel fund
  • Buy a vacation home in a place that gets a lot of sun
  • Pay off all the bills (and never ever have to worry about bills again)
  • Sock away more than adequate funds for retirement
  • Spend a day (heck, a week) at a spa
  • Sponsor my husband in his triathlon endeavors
  • Upgrade my wardrobe
  • Remodel our home
  • Create an Eden (of our own definition) in our backyard
  • Redecorate my office
  • Join a posh gym (one where the equipment works on a regular basis and the smaller weights don’t go missing)
  • Buy a perfect chair for reading

Earlier this evening I checked the numbers online, and I didn’t get a single one. Well, phooey. But I did receive two checks in the mail for jobs I completed this month, and they both arrived earlier than expected. So I can pay bills this weekend with a little more ease, maybe set a little aside in a fund to one day purchase one of my dream items. I’ll count that as a “win”.

The Ah-Hahs: As I walked and thought, two things crossed my mind. (1) More than any “thing,” what I want is financial security. And (2), I can put my nose to the grindstone and make any of the above dreams (including financial security) my reality. It will mean making choices and sacrifices. It will mean setting intentions and goals and working my butt off.

The same can be said for anything I really really want. I just need to decide what that is…and go for it.

 

 

 

 

Nudged: Clean out a drawer

Leave a reply

Backstory: This is part of my ongoing efforts to get rid of clutter, to open up some space and allow more light and breath into my life.

Earlier this week I caught up with my mom. After she gave me updates on various family members and we talked through possible plans for the December holidays, she shared with me what she had planned for her day: “Going through piles, reading the to do list, updating the to do list, sending recipes to friends, going through recipes and setting them aside because I’ll make them some day….”

And I saw my future.

I’m not sharing this with you to in any way dis my mom. But, honestly, I do not want to be looking at the same to do list 30 years from now. I do not want to be spending my golden years sorting through all the stuff and files and papers and projects I’ll get to “some day”.

In fact, I don’t want to be dealing with all this accumulated junk two years from now. So I’m starting somewhere.

What happened: My first thought was to go through my lingerie drawer. It’s entirely possible that the last time I went through it was 10 years ago, when I made my last big move. But I was pretty overwhelmed at the time, so it’s likely everything got pulled out, dumped into a box, then re-dumped into the drawer. I know I have at least two bras in there that pre-date my marriage. I also am pretty sure I have a few half-slips in there, yet I can’t recall the last time I wore or even needed one. Plus I’m sure there are a number of items that need to be tossed and replaced.

I didn’t feel like setting myself up for a shopping/spending excursion just yet, so that drawer got put off. Next up, I thought about going through one of the crowded drawers in my work filing cabinet. Every so often I go through and pull out the files for clients who are no longer active and one-off projects that were completed long ago, and put those folders into archives in the basement. But actually, these drawers aren’t in horrible shape.

As I looked around the office and thought about the options, my attention was drawn to the little table next to the door. This is kind of my launching pad. It’s where I keep coupons, sunglasses, outgoing mail, magazines I’ve read and am ready to take to the gym. And there’s a drawer in it. I’d completely forgotten it had a drawer. Ha!

So I pulled everything out and off and went through it. The sand from a favorite beach (that baggie) finally went into the jar (also pictured) and is now displayed on a shelf. (I’m starting a collection from favorite beaches around the world.) The magazines went to the gym. The expired coupons went into the trash. The hand-warming gel pack I got as a stocking stuffer I don’t know how long ago went into the pocket of my dog walking jacket. The Canadian coins (?), I’m not sure what to do with those, but I certainly don’t need to save them for anything.

I also discovered a pair of binoculars (totally forgot I owned these!), three decks of playing cards, an old desk clock that has been in need of repair for ages, and a gift card for a scalp massage and blow out. (Totally scheduling that for the next week.)

In the drawer I discovered old padlocks and gym locker locks, keys to old luggage, and a spare key to a car we sold like two years ago. (I vaguely recall tearing the house apart, trying to find it. Ooops.)

 

Before…

…and after.

 

The Ah-Hah: Jeez. I wish I felt better about this. I did go through everything, toss a few things, and set some items aside for follow-up (clock repair, blow out, the filter for the bathroom faucet I need to replace). But this just reminds me of how much more I have to do around here. The good news is, I got through this section in less than 30 minutes, and I do see and feel a difference having this one little space of order and serenity.

I am thinking that I need to get myself on some kind of program. Maybe I designate 15 minutes a day to go through things. Maybe I partner with a girlfriend and we help each other by showing some tough love as we go through and toss stuff. Maybe I commit to following FlyLady (oh, how I love her) every day for the next six months for motivation. Maybe this is my next chapter of 52Nudges.

Meanwhile, I have a new perspective on decluttering. It’s been a common theme in this nudging process, and at times it’s seemed silly, or not related to the bigger goals I have for myself. But I’ve come to see it not only as lightening my load and clearing the space around me so I can clear my the space in my head; I’m starting to understand it as a treasure hunt:

  • I better know what my treasurers are, those items that bring beauty and joy to my life, those items I want to keep
  • I unearth hints of who I am, old passions that might be rekindled, mementos of old achievements that remind me of what I’ve overcome and what I’m capable of

What personal treasures have you rediscovered?

Nudged: Open DNS wine; drink from Waterford glass

3 Replies

Backstory: DNS stands for “Do Not Share” and represents the bottles of wine in our basement on which we’ve spent too much money. They were purchased amidst conversations such as “This would be great for your milestone birthday! We can open this on our anniversary! Let’s save this for…”, but then they sit on the shelves because nothing ever seems quite “DNS-worthy”.

Ridiculous. These are meant to be enjoyed!

So this week I’m going to open one up, let it breathe, then pour it into the Waterford crystal glasses my mother gave me decades ago for my Hope Chest.

Anyone else have one of those lying around? When was the last time you opened it? When was the last time you used one of the “special” items stored inside?

Here’s your Nudge to do just that.

P.S. I’m not yet sure of my husband’s plans this week, but I will try to work around his schedule so he can share in this. If he isn’t available, I’m still going to do this Nudge by and for myself. Whether you’re with a significant other, a houseful of cranky teenagers, a roommate, friends, or just your wonderful self, I hope you’ll find a way to treat yourself to something extra special this week. Don’t have anything stashed away? Why not splurge a bit and go get something, even if it’s just one glass of a super delicious beverage at a restaurant or bar? Not a drinker? Then buy the fancy chocolate or overpriced organic produce or the freshest and most delicious cut of something at the butcher’s or fish counter. You’re worth it!

What Happened: Last night, I ordered Chinese food for delivery. But instead of eating out of the little white boxes in front of the TV (a typical weeknight practice after long days), we spooned our food onto the good china plates and took everything to the dining room table. I lit some candles, and I poured the wine into the beautiful Waterford glasses. Everything about this meal encouraged taking our time. We ate—not gobbled—our food. We sipped a gorgeous wine that encouraged enjoying, not overdoing. We had a relaxed conversation, versus trying to achieve relaxation by zoning out.

It was a lovely evening.

Ah-Hah: Making tonight happen actually took very little effort. Why is it I felt like it would be a hassle? I clearly spent no time on food prep, and cleanup was not so bad. Amazing how just a few adjustments—using the good plates and glasses, choosing to sit at the table versus the TV trays—could make such a difference in how truly relaxed we felt.

Also, sometimes I look at our modest collection of wine in the basement and I imagine how I’ll feel if it all comes crashing down in an earthquake. Sobering, right? (And I realize that was a lousy pun.) We’ve worked hard for the nice things we have in life, and it’s time we started enjoying the fruits—and wines—of our labors.

Nudged: Call someone I haven’t spoken to in 6+ months

Leave a reply

Backstory: Reconnecting can be divine. Recently, I chatted with a friend I haven’t seen in 10 years (yikes, that flew by), and we picked up the conversation like we had last seen each other yesterday.

Certainly this Nudge has a bit of that hopefulness in it, but as I’m working on some different goals in my life, I recognize that there’s also a (selfish) part of me that needs to keep up my professional network. I mean, who knows who I might talk to who has a project for me or a job lead or knows a friend who has a colleague who is looking for someone just like me to fill a role in a fun company?

You never know where the conversation might lead.

Who you gonna call?

What Happened: I scrolled through my Contacts list and noted five who had potential:

  • A long-ago client, who became a friend
  • A very busy working mom of two small children
  • A friend who popped up on Facebook after being AWOL for ages
  • The mother of a close friend to whom I feel I owe a catching-up call
  • A friend who always says “Let’s get together!” but is never the one to make the plans

I kinda cheated on the first two. Texted the client to see if she was available to meet up for a glass of wine. She wasn’t this week, but the door is open to find another time. I also texted the busy mom with a “Thinking of you!” message. This whole chapter of her life is insane right now, and part of me feels like I don’t want to burden her with friendship. But I do want to keep the connection open, and someday we’ll reconnect (I hope).

Midweek, a woman I was supposed to interview for an article had to reschedule. Suddenly I had an hour free, so I pulled out my list. I took inventory of my feelings as I considered the last three women, and you know what? I didn’t feel like talking with any of them. I didn’t feel like being the friend who, once again, is the one making all the effort. If they wanted to talk with me, they have my number.

Instead, I called a dear friend, someone I talk with pretty regularly, though not often. She is someone who gets the whole give-and-take of a friendship. Sometimes she is the one who reaches out to me. This week, I reached out to her.

The timing was perfect. I caught her during a breather at work and we caught up on how our parents are doing, travel plans, dreams and intuitions for our futures. It was a short and sweet conversation, it was a lovely reconnection.

The Ah-Ha: I make an effort into keeping in touch with a wide network of people—family, friends, former coworkers. I think it’s important to maintain connections, but, with some people, there’s a part of me that’s tired of doing all the work, and I got clearer on this for myself this week. Why do I put energy into relationships that just suck energy out of me? Why do I even care about trying to reach out in friendship to people who only get in touch when they need something (money, a favor, a few hours of free work on their website “because we’re friends”)? Hmmph.

Actually, it’s deeper than just being tired of trying to keep up with the masses. Instead, I’d like to put that extra time and energy into the nurturing the dear friendships I do have. Quality over quantity. I’d like to spend more time discovering the depths of a selection of relationships, and build upon those.

As I considered who I might call this week to complete the Nudge, I realized I’m okay with quietly letting some people go and getting on with life.

I feel like I’ve taken “decluttering” to a whole new level.

Nudged: Submit an essay/pitch for publication

Leave a reply

Backstory: This is one of the hardest parts of my work. You send out something you’ve crafted, something you’ve nurtured and cried over and sweated through, and you hope-hope-hope someone LOVES IT and wants to help you share it with the world. And if you’re lucky, they’ll also want to pay you for the privilege.

I’ve gotten out of the habit of pitching lately. It is a tremendous amount of work and can be incredibly discouraging. But, if I’m not putting my work out there, it can’t be picked up, and it won’t ever be read.

So this week I’m going to take a look at what’s in my circulation file and put myself out there again.

How might you Nudge yourself out of your professional comfort zone this week? Is it time to update your LinkedIn profile? Apply online to an open position? Make some calls and do some networking?

Do it.

What Happened: Two pieces were on my mind, and I began the week with the intention of pitching them both to two separate entities. Both are of a personal nature, so both involve not only putting my writing work on the line, but also my small vulnerable human ego.

I sent out one, pitching a story for a live-reading event. And it was accepted—wahoo!

I had every intention of polishing the pitch for the second piece, researching publications, and sending it out to an editor, but work and life got in the way (yes, and being a chicken), and it didn’t happen.

One of my many repositories for ideas, pitches, works-in-progress. Sheesh.

I’m thinking this Nudge needs to return to the bowl for a second attempt.

The Ah-Hahs: Believe in my gifts and my work. Take risks. Be fearless!

Nudged: Take Thor to a new place for date night

Leave a reply

Backstory: (For those of you who are new to 52Nudges, “Thor” is the code name for my darling husband.)

I think we’re pretty good about getting out on date nights, but we certainly have our favorite spots (some might call that a “rut”). This is our chance to try something new.

Maybe this is the week we’ll check out one of the ethnic restaurants I learned about when I was inspired by visiting a new market (read the post here). Maybe we’ll put a bunch of different restaurant names on strips of paper, toss them in a bowl, and make a random selection. Or maybe we’ll skip dinner and go straight to a bowling alley, movie theater with recliners, miniature golf course, or pumpkin patch. Hmmm…I might have date night ideas for the next several months!

What would be fun for you? Significant other not available or up for adventure? Then take yourself out. Or call up a friend…or several friends. Wherever you end up, I hope you’ll take a moment to toast yourself for nudging yourself into trying something new. xo

What Happened: There were so many great options, so many places nearby we have yet to try! Finally I decided on a tiny family-owned Italian place we’ve driven past for years. While it’s barely nudging us out of our comfort zone, my choice does have an intention. We’re starting to save up for a big vacation in Italy, and I’m watching movies, reading books, listening to language CDs, and doing whatever I can to keep us motivated to save that money and get excited about going on this adventure together.

I booked the table, then I sent Thor a text message to formally ask him out on a date. It’s silly, I know, but when was the last time you practiced all those courting rituals? He responded in kind, and we were set.

I arrived a bit early and was seated when he walked in the door. Although I know he saw me, he made a point of checking at the counter, then he turned to me and introduced himself as if it was a first, and blind, date. Silly (and adorable) man. Then…he pulled this from behind his back:

So, yes, I married a gem. We had a lovely evening, we nurtured our romance, and we discovered a sweet local restaurant to which we’ll return.

Ah-Hahs: This was one of those “small Nudges” that was so easy to do and so fun. So what if it didn’t lead to any new epiphanies? It was simply fun to venture out of our normal routine.

But I did have one bigger ah-hah: I don’t get flowers spontaneously very often any more. Maybe I’ll receive something on a birthday or following a medical procedure (right?), but flowers “just because”? Doesn’t much happen.

It was really nice, it left me feeling almost giddy. And I’d like for my friends to feel this way more often too. So I’m adding this to the bowl of Nudges: Send flowers to a friend for no particular occasion.

 

Nudged: Go to the gym 3x

Leave a reply

Backstory: This was a drop-in, you won’t find it on the List. Here’s what happened:

My darling husband, Thor (the name he picked for himself for when he’s mentioned here), has been checking every Sunday to hear about what I’ve done and what I’ve drawn for the coming week. He’s made some excellent suggestions along the way, and helped me to rehash and reevaluate post-Nudge thoughts. A few times I’ve asked if he’s wanted to do the Nudge with me, but he’s always declined. Up till this week.

We’ve both been super-busy with work commitments, with additional events happening after hours and on weekends. It’s a lot. And lately I’ve found our daily check-in conversation goes something like this:

Venus: How was your day?

Mars: Fine.

Venus: How are you?

Mars: Fine.

Venus: What’s on your mind?

Mars: Nothing.

So yesterday we took Louie the dog out for a long walk and caught up. After our usual check-ins (see above), he shared with me that he’s dragging around the weight of not knowing what he wants to do with the last half of his life, a dilemma I can certainly relate to. Many of our friends are retiring from careers and now have time to pursue long-time passions and hobbies. What might ours be? We’ve talked about signing up for classes, brainstorming, getting creative about figuring this out…. No surprise, to him (to many of us) the prospect of figuring out The Rest of Our Lives is overwhelming.

I shared with him the questions Saeeda shared with me during our interview a couple of months ago (read it here): Not “What do you want to do?” in life, but “How do you want to feel?” There are no right/wrong answers, I said to Thor. “You can pick intellectually challenged, silly, strong, relaxed, content, intrigued, entertained…let’s start with how you’d like to feel and we’ll figure out the doing part later.”

Over brunch I suggested we brainstorm some ideas for this. Not happening. Okay. But mid-afternoon he told me he’d decided his Nudge for this week would be “Go to the gym 3 times.” Perfect.

I will be doing this Nudge with him. It’s my hope that we’ll go to the gym together on some, if not all, outings, but since he likes to get up at 4:00 am (and I, well, don’t), we’ll see how it goes.

As we head into this week, I’m thinking about how having someone as an accountability partner can nudge us a little further. Or it can simply make it more fun. If you don’t have a spouse or significant other, think about asking a friend to join you in a Nudge. If that doesn’t feel comfortable to you, then consider making me your partner. Share your chosen Nudge for the week, update me in comments, and at the end of the week, let me know how you did. Let’s encourage each other to fuller lives.

What Happened: Monday morning, 4:55 am: “Kath. It’s time.”

My darling likes to get up at 4:00 am on weekdays, have his coffee, watch the news, clean the kitchen (I told you he’s a gem), then be at the gym when they open their doors at 5:00 sharp. I aspire to this, but my days are really really long and I get really really tired. I begged off on this first day. However, a couple of hours later, when my to do list threatened to consume all of today and tomorrow, I remembered my commitment to this Nudge and got myself out the door. Got my workout in and checked off the first of three days. Yay!

Tuesday morning I was up and dressed before Thor gave me my five-minute warning. We got to the gym, got in our workouts, and got our days started. Wahoo!

Wednesday: I don’t know if this is allergies or a cold or my body just crying uncle. I’m out. Thor had an especially long day ahead, so he went into the office to prep early. There’s still time to do this.

Thursday, Friday, Saturday…(see “Wednesday”).

The Ah-Ha: You know, “best laid plans” and all. We both got two outta three, and I’ll take it. It was fun to come up with this idea and pursue it together, and I’m proud of us for giving this a shot.

I also realize this whole creative Nudging adventure is not really Thor’s thing, and I won’t push him to actively participate with me each week, but I do hope we’ll figure out other Nudges we can do together.

I asked Thor for his ah-hah on his first full Nudging experience and got, “It was fine.”

I’m good with that.

What greeted me at 5:00 am 🙂

 

Nudged: Get 8 hours of sleep every night

Leave a reply

Backstory: Well, um, I need to get more and better sleep.

I keep hearing about how lack of sleep effects everything, including my ability to lose weight. I know I need to be better about this, but it always seems to be the easiest thing to cut when deadlines and to do lists and responsibilities are hanging over me.

It’s no coincidence that I recently finished reading the August issue of National Geographic, for which the theme is “The Science of Sleep.”

Did you know “anyone who regularly sleeps less than six hours has a higher risk of depression, psychosis, stroke, and obesity”?

Yikes.

So this week I’m going to walk away from the office, turn off the TV, ignore the phone, and catch some extra zzzzzs.

 

P.S. For inspiration and motivation, I recommend you read the book Thrive by Arianna Huffington. No spoilers, but she got a “wake-up call” when sleep deprivation became a real problem from her—then she took the steps to make a good night’s sleep a priority in her life.

 

What Happened: Here is a photo of my cozy nest, my new Happy Place:

I nailed this Nudge. Every night this week I was in bed, lights out, by 11:00. Most nights I was tucked in before 10. This is huge for me. And even though there were a couple of nights when I woke up in the wee hours, this week I was able to go back to sleep after a short break. (Typically I am wide awake and up for a few hours—hello, hormonal fluctuations!) My daily average: 8.33 hours.

I wish I could tell you how I managed to pull this off, but I didn’t do anything other than set an intention to go to bed at a “decent” hour and then do it. No reading one more chapter, no running one more load of laundry, no replying to one (or two or ten) more emails. Lights out!

The Ah-Hahs: To completely skew all scientific research on this Nudge, I also decided to make this a week of (almost) no online news. I didn’t read the stories about local crime on SFGate, check on our country’s standing on the international stage on BBC, like any postings from “friends” on Facebook, or keep up with the Kardashians on People.

I can’t tell you if all of the above or parts contributed to weight loss (didn’t weigh in this week) or helped me be more creative and productive in my work or made me less susceptible to serious health issues. But I can tell you I feel good today. I might even say I feel rested.

Wow.

 

Nudged: Visit a new-to-me bookshop (again)

Leave a reply

Backstory: What the…?! Didn’t I already…? Yes!

I must have put the wadded-up piece of paper back into the bowl, because this was one of my earliest Nudges. Ha! (Read the original Nudged post here.)

I could have tossed it, but the “rules” say I “have” to do what I’ve drawn, and I don’t want to waste one of my remaining passes.

The really crazy thing is that I am going somewhere this coming week that will be capital-p Perfect for this Nudge. No coincidences here!

Meanwhile, if you’re new to this site, take a look at the original “Visit a new-to-me bookshop” Nudge for inspiration for what you might do this week. You might go to the charming neighborhood shop and browse a section that’s not your usual destination (Poetry instead of Mysteries, or Biographies about grown-ups for you instead of YA and Children’s Lit for your kids). If books aren’t your thing, maybe you can go to a music shop or a hobby shop or a spice shop. I hope you will Nudge yourself out of your “nest” and expand your horizons. More than that, I hope you will have some FUN this week!

What Happened: Greetings from Portland, Oregon! If you are a bibliophile like me, you now know why this Nudge (a repeat) was absolutely perfect for this week: Portland is the home of Powell’s Books, the world’s largest independent book store. The funny part is, when I planned our get-outta-town vacation, I had not included this on our list of things to do and see. Yet Powell’s to me is like the god of all book stores, the Mother Ship, my Mecca.

 

I could have easily spent a full day there, wandering, touching, learning, exploring. The Rare Book Room itself was worth the whole trip. Naturally, I’d planned to just look. Naturally, I left with a bag of new books. 🙂

The Ah-Hahs: My husband and I work long hours and long days for long stretches of time. We take on a lot of responsibilities in both our jobs and personal lives. We were desperate for a vacation, but couldn’t come up with some place where we really really wanted to go, so Portland happened on a whim. We had a great time, but I think we need to be more intentional about how we spend our vacation time and dollars. We’re starting to talk about what might be our other Meccas, including places we want to see and experience while we’re physically able (time is not our friend on this). Machu Picchu comes to mind. A return to Paris. A walking trip through the Cotswolds. A long visit with my oldest girlfriend.

What is your Mecca? Can you start today planning how you might get there?

In addition to visiting Powell’s, we also wandered the fabulous Japanese Garden. We have a fabulous Japanese Tea Garden in Golden Gate Park, about 15 minutes from home, a place we’ve visited…never. In my 10 years in the city, in his 20-plus, we’ve never once set foot inside the gates. They even have days when entry is free to city residents. No excuses!

So, in addition to creating a list of far-flung places we want to visit, we’re making a list of places we might discover on a stay-cation: historical walking tours, the city’s “best” donuts/signature cocktails/brunch, the coolest spots for people-watching.

I hope you’ll share with me some of your inspirations, then watch for some of those to appear on the List for future Nudges.