Background: Some people call it “random acts of kindness”. For whatever reason, years ago I started calling them “Fairy Deeds”. Maybe because it feels like there’s magic in it, as I flit in and out to deliver the gift.
The idea is to give something small that lifts someone else’s spirits. In the past I’ve left a bag with lemons and sugar with a note encouraging the recipient to turn a rough period into lemonade. I’ve mailed scratcher lottery tickets. I’ve cut flowers from my garden, tied them in a bow, and placed them on neighbors’ doorsteps (while engaging in a silly grownup version of “Ding-Dong Ditch” so they found the gift before it had wilted). The anonymous part of doing a Fairy Deed is important to me, in that it doesn’t set up the expectation of reciprocation.
This doesn’t need to be an extravagant act, and in keeping with the 52Nudges rules, it should be “cheap”. But if you have the means and the desire, go for leaving a ginormous tip for the gal who brews your morning coffee with a smile (and looks like she can’t take one more day of this pandemic). Have fun with it…because the secondary gift of this nudge is that it lifts the giver’s spirits too.
What Happened: I got stuck on the “anonymous” part. In the past, that has been important to me. But as I thought about what I most wanted to do this week, I kept coming back to baking something sweet for my neighbors, specifically a Victoria Sponge cake. Several weeks ago I made my first one, shared it with a few households, and subsequently learned that it was one neighbor’s favorites (let’s call him Hank). Okay, then. That’s what I did this week. I baked and cooled the cakes, spread the first with raspberry preserves, placed the second cake on top to make the “sandwich”, and sliced it into individual servings. (Note: A bit of fresh whipped cream is a nice touch.)
After giving Thor his share (of course), I wrapped up several slices for Hank and his family. I popped next door, left the offering on the mat, rang the doorbell, and dashed–not quite quick enough, because his wife answered before I made it down the stairs. 🙂
It wouldn’t have been a completely anonymous act anyway, since I had once before delivered this particular cake. But there was still that fun element of surprising them.
Now here’s where it gets…um…interesting. Shortly after I got home, I received a text message from Hank’s adult son. Earlier in the week the family had made the decision to bring in 24/7 in-home care and shift Hank to hospice care. I’ve known for several months about Hank’s evolving condition (aging is not for sissies) and have done what I can to support this family. They are doing okay for the most part, but this stage of life is never easy. Hank’s son reported to me that they heard the doorbell ring while he and his dad were in the middle of sharing stories. “That Kathy can bake,” Hank said, as he enjoyed the cake.
The Ah-Hahs: I cried as I typed the above. I am so grateful/relieved that I got that cake to Hank in time for him to fully enjoy it. I hope it helped to remind him and his family of the sweet things in life. That gives me a little peace.
The takeaway for this Nudge is: Don’t Wait! Do that small act of kindness now. You never know how big it might be for the recipient.