Backstory: This one is inspired by “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?” For real! The idea is to look around at my various projects and to do lists, figure out where I need help, and tap into my wealth of personal resources. I have friends who are have an eye for interior design, who have a true sense of fashion, who are organizational gurus, who are handymen (and women!). It’s about stopping the procrastination and asking for help.
Who you gonna call? 🙂
Today was one of those days I really struggled to get out of bed, and I have felt unfocused and unmotivated in the hours since. The reasons may include:
Or “Z, all of the above”.
Plus…
If you came of age in the 1980s and started your career in the 1990s, like I did, you probably watched closely as Professor Anita Hill gave her testimony before the U.S. Senate in 1991 about abuse she suffered from a nominee for the Supreme Court. I was so impressed by her, by her courage and her integrity, about her willingness to speak about unspeakable acts in the face of threats, intimation, and shaming. (If you aren’t familiar with her story, check out the documentary Anita that came out in 2013.) When her testimony was essentially dismissed, the message that went out to women like me was, “Don’t bother speaking up. If they didn’t believe her, they’ll never believe you.”
This morning Dr. Christine Blasey Ford gave her emotional testimony about the sexual abuse she endured decades ago. Déjà vu. I haven’t been able to watch all of the broadcasts, but I’ve read her opening statement and seen some of the highlights. And as I’ve done so, it struck me that I’ve been suffering from a form of PTSD for the better part of 30 years. I am angry. I am scared. I am so over the way women have been and continue to be treated in our world.
For as long as I can remember, I—we—have been told “Don’t say anything…If you want to keep your job…If you don’t want to ruin your reputation…Too bad you don’t have a sense of humor…Don’t be so uptight…You’re way too sensitive.”
I am one of the lucky few who has not been a victim of violent assault, but I’ve endured my share of inappropriate and misogynistic behavior. I’ve also stood by friends as they fought to overcome traumas of abuse. I am feeling desperate today for these women—for all of us—to be heard and for all forms of sexual abuse to stop.
I share this with you because I know that most cases of abuse are never reported, and most victims never get a chance to get help. I know how horrible reporting and testifying can be, so I don’t ask that of you. But if you have been victimized, in any way, I ask that you break your silence and ask for help. Confide in a close friend, reach out to a pastor, find a therapist.
CNN published a list of services that offer resources to help survivors of sexual assault. Read the full article here, or here’s a short list:
Please do not suffer in silence any longer. Please nudge yourself to get help today.
I believe you. I stand with you.