Tag Archives: surprise

Nudging: Make a pie or tart

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Backstory: The full Nudge I created for myself reads:

“Surprise Thor with a pie or tart”

I couldn’t have picked a better Nudge at this time. If you’ve been following this blog, you know that today marks my return to nudging after “The Appendix Adventure.” I am happy to report that I finally–finally, after two months–feel good again. Not quite 100%, but figuring out what that means for me and getting there.

It’s so appropriate that this week I will do something special to thank my darling husband for his support and devotion these past couple of months (and always, really) with one of his favorite treats.

If you have someone special you’d like to thank, consider surprising them with a treat — homemade or store-bought. Or maybe this is a Nudge to treat yourself to something yummy. Have fun with it!

P.S. And while I’ve been out, my team has continued to work on the new (and so much prettier) 52Nudges website. We will be launching it soon!

Nudging: Notice something

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Backstory: Oooo I love this nudge! It is inspired by artist Jenny Odell. I heard her speak at the In/Visible Talks design+art conference in 2018 (you’ll find the video of her talk on “How to Do Nothing” here), and her suggestion to “notice” things has stuck with me.

Using Jenny’s example, instead of bird-watching–which is a sort of doing, where you look for birds and check them off your list–you shift your attention to bird-noticing. You might listen for different bird songs, take in the brilliant colors in their feathers, watch for different patterns of flight. It’s a practice that encourages me to slow down, quiet myself, focus, and appreciate.

On a vacation, this nudge reminded me to stop on my walks and do a 360, literally turn around in a circle and take in everything around me. What a revelation! I noticed pebbles, clouds, architectural details, and the feel of the breeze on my skin. Another time, while doing my weekly grocery shopping, I slowed my rush to finish the task and noticed how beautifully bizarre fresh produce is. I mean–artichokes! I have a special respect for the first person who figured out how to eat one. (I like mine steamed in beer and dipped in melted butter, btw.)

Another aspect I love about this nudge is the necessary element of surprise. Who knows what I will notice–and be delighted by–this week!

 

Nudged: Do a Fairy Deed

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Background: Some people call it “random acts of kindness”. For whatever reason, years ago I started calling them “Fairy Deeds”. Maybe because it feels like there’s magic in it, as I flit in and out to deliver the gift.

The idea is to give something small that lifts someone else’s spirits. In the past I’ve left a bag with lemons and sugar with a note encouraging the recipient to turn a rough period into lemonade. I’ve mailed scratcher lottery tickets. I’ve cut flowers from my garden, tied them in a bow, and placed them on neighbors’ doorsteps (while engaging in a silly grownup version of “Ding-Dong Ditch” so they found the gift before it had wilted). The anonymous part of doing a Fairy Deed is important to me, in that it doesn’t set up the expectation of reciprocation.

This doesn’t need to be an extravagant act, and in keeping with the 52Nudges rules, it should be “cheap”. But if you have the means and the desire, go for leaving a ginormous tip for the gal who brews your morning coffee with a smile (and looks like she can’t take one more day of this pandemic). Have fun with it…because the secondary gift of this nudge is that it lifts the giver’s spirits too.

What Happened: I got stuck on the “anonymous” part. In the past, that has been important to me. But as I thought about what I most wanted to do this week, I kept coming back to baking something sweet for my neighbors, specifically a Victoria Sponge cake. Several weeks ago I made my first one, shared it with a few households, and subsequently learned that it was one neighbor’s favorites (let’s call him Hank). Okay, then. That’s what I did this week. I baked and cooled the cakes, spread the first with raspberry preserves, placed the second cake on top to make the “sandwich”, and sliced it into individual servings. (Note: A bit of fresh whipped cream is a nice touch.)

Victoria Sandwich

After giving Thor his share (of course), I wrapped up several slices for Hank and his family. I popped next door, left the offering on the mat, rang the doorbell, and dashed–not quite quick enough, because his wife answered before I made it down the stairs. 🙂

It wouldn’t have been a completely anonymous act anyway, since I had once before delivered this particular cake. But there was still that fun element of surprising them.

Now here’s where it gets…um…interesting. Shortly after I got home, I received a text message from Hank’s adult son. Earlier in the week the family had made the decision to bring in 24/7 in-home care and shift Hank to hospice care. I’ve known for several months about Hank’s evolving condition (aging is not for sissies) and have done what I can to support this family. They are doing okay for the most part, but this stage of life is never easy. Hank’s son reported to me that they heard the doorbell ring while he and his dad were in the middle of sharing stories. “That Kathy can bake,” Hank said, as he enjoyed the cake.

The Ah-Hahs: I cried as I typed the above. I am so grateful/relieved that I got that cake to Hank in time for him to fully enjoy it. I hope it helped to remind him and his family of the sweet things in life. That gives me a little peace.

The takeaway for this Nudge is: Don’t Wait! Do that small act of kindness now. You never know how big it might be for the recipient.

Nudged: Stash $s in pockets

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Backstory: Maybe 25 years ago, a friend introduced me to this idea: Get a stack of dollar bills and “stash” them away in the pockets of coats, purses, hidden spots, etc., so that months later, when I find them again, I’ll be surprised and delighted. (I think it also had something to do with attracting abundance, but that part of it is lost to my memory.)

Imagine this: A couple of seasons from now, you’re heading out to run errands or meet a client or take care of some task that has you all stressed out. You hustle into your jacket, hoping it still fits after the indulges (aka stress eating) of the previous months, grab your purse, grab your keys, double-check to make sure your wallet and cell phone are with you. With a deep breath (aka heavy sigh of the overburdened), you head out the door and stuff your hands into your pockets to avoid the chill that has permeated the air since yesterday. Wait…what’s this? Oh, geez, is it an old to do list? The phone number of someone you were supposed to call ages ago? The long-lost receipt for that item you meant to return? Nope. It’s a crisp dollar bill! Huzzah! Add that to the change jingling at the bottom of your purse, and you can treat yourself to a hot and soothing cuppa tea!

Some might ask if this a true Nudge. Does it push me out of my comfort zone, help me to reveal some great Ah-Hah? Probably not. But it definitely qualifies as fun.

What Happened: Just asking for change in singles made me giggle to myself. Does the cashier think I’m heading for a strip club? Ha!

From the moment I pulled this Nudge, I felt the anticipation. It’s funny, because none of this will come to fruition for a long time. In fact, I hope it takes a long time, because that will make the reveal so much more fun for me.

$10 – or rather, ten single $1 bills.

The first went into the pocket of my fanciest coat, one that doesn’t get taken out of the closet very often. (Hmmm…idea for a future Nudge?) The second went into a random page of one of my all-time favorite books, one I know I’ll re-read in a year or two. For half a second I thought about how it would suck if I decide to donate the coat or book before I discover the hidden treasure, but since it’s only a buck, it wouldn’t be a hard loss. And I enjoyed imagining that savvy second-hand shopper as she discovers the bonus inside.

Bill #3 got tucked into the back of a picture frame. And so on. Throughout this week, I let ideas present themselves to me and hid the bills around the house. And each time I felt…giddy.

Giddy. “Dizzy; lighthearted; silly; joyfully elated,” says Merriam-Webster. Yep. All of the above. All week long I felt this in spurts, and I know I will feel giddy again at least 10 more times as I rediscover the bills.

Ah-Hahs: There are so few good surprises left in life. I remember how much fun I had doing Fairy Deeds for others (see this post), so how fun was this to set myself up for 10 future surprises!

Lately I’ve been working on finding my mojo (see this post) and getting through an especially dark Life Funk. There were times I’ve thought about rebooting with a spa day (couple hundred $) or a session with a professional counselor (couple hundred more $). Instead, I spent (but didn’t really spend) just $10 and succeeded in nudging my spirits up for the week.

 

Dear Reader, Whether you’re new to 52Nudges or have been following along for a while, I would appreciate your feedback. Specifically, I’d like to know if there was (1) a previous Nudge you found was impactful for you and (2) a previous Nudge that you’d like to give another go in the future. Send me a note in comments. Thank you!