Backstory: This Nudge didn’t come from the bowl. This is one I dropped in because I’m struggling today. Maybe it’s the post-holidays blues. Maybe it’s the cold and gloominess of the season. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a real affliction, in case you didn’t know. Maybe it’s the ongoing frustration of not having a clear path, a clear purpose.
I’m not sure what’s up (or down) with me right now, but I feel the need to find something to get me up in the mornings. Something other than piles of laundry that need to be addressed or bills that need to be paid. I am dragging through my days, so much so that yesterday, as I lay in bed dreading my day (and it was a Saturday!), I had a small fantasy about pulling everything off the top of my desk and burning it in the fireplace. Yes, I know that wouldn’t really solve any problems—likely make some worse—but the idea of having a clean start is appealing.
Where is my magic? What happened to my mojo? I need to find it and put it back to work.
P.S. I did check in with myself and know it isn’t chronic depression, lack of sleep, or illness causing my malaise. If your blue mood is lasting longer than is okay, please schedule a checkup with your doctor or reach out to someone for help. xo
What Happened: I started by looking up the definition of “mojo”, and this is some of what I found:
“a quality or some ability that brings good luck or helps you be good at something”
“personal confidence and charisma”
“self-confidence, self-assuredness”
“belief in one’s self”
“a good luck charm to bolster confidence”
“the ability to bounce back from a debilitating trauma or negative attitude”
“magical power”
(Sources: Urban Dictionary, Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary)
This helped me clarify that I am not looking for a thing—a charm or amulet—that will provide me with power, I’m looking for actions that will rekindle the magical power I have inside me, a power that seems to have gone temporarily dormant.
Over the week I set aside some quiet time to think about what makes me feel good, makes me feel energized and calm and happy and me. Here are some of the things that came up:
- pulling myself together (if I dress better, I feel better)
- knowing there’s money in the bank (catching up and staying current with accounting)
- clearing space in my office (and subsequently clearing my head)
- writing personal letters to family and friends (and, as a result, reading their replies)
- doing something crafty (on my to do list is sewing cheery curtains for the kitchen and pulling out the cross-stitching box)
- cooking and baking
- playing with Thor (my darling husband), especially when we do slightly crazy touristy things
- a tidy house
- talking walks (for exercise and meditation)
- get-togethers with friends (especially one-on-one or in small, intimate groups)
- watching a really great movie
- getting lost in a really great book
I then took one step, sort of a new year’s thing, but really exactly the Nudge I needed this week: I cracked open a new notebook and started a gratitude journal. I know this to be such a great tool, but haven’t used it for a while. Now is the perfect time to remind myself—with just three items a day—of how much I have to be thankful for, even on those days when it feels like a stretch. A few of the items on this week’s page:
- cozy new PJs
- the trusty, hard-working space heater in my office
- Thor, my funny, affectionate, appreciative, generous life partner
- good dark chocolate
- my loyal Louie (the dog)
- fresh raspberries
- the fabulous women of my book club
- this whole crazy 52Nudges adventure
Ah-Hahs: You know what those actions on my list above are, right? Nudges. I wrote a bunch on strips of paper and added them to the bowl. I believe taking these small steps over time will help me find my mojo and continue to nurture it.
P.S. Just before the Christmas, a friend shared a list of “20 Ways to Be Kind (without spending a dime)”, ideas of actions that could be given instead of purchased things. Take a look and see if any of these inspire you for new additions to your Nudges:
- send a handwritten note
- recreate a special day
- listen without distractions
- include someone new
- smile more
- look for common ground
- assume the best in everyone
- share your prayers (If someone asks for prayer support, respond with a text or note what you said in your actual prayer.)
- affirm someone
- apologize early and often
- be clear (but polite)
- be kind to yourself
- lend a hand
- pay it forward…for free!
- offer to babysit
- donate used clothing
- curb the road rage
- give your time
- let people know they matter (Learn the name of the guy who makes your coffee, the waiter at your favorite restaurant, the crossing guard.)
- share the wisdom you’ve learned
