Tag Archives: challenge

Nudging: Spiff up something

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Backstory: I had to look back at my notes to remind myself why I included this nudge, and I’m sorry to report they aren’t particularly inspiring: “Clear it off or clean it up.” Geez.

But if I’ve learned anything during these past several years of nudging, sometimes the “simplest” challenge reveals a deeper significance. And as I sit here considering what I might do, I think perhaps “I” might be the recipient of some spiffing up this week. Spiritually, emotionally, physically…lots of possibilities there.

As always, make this your own.

 

Nudging: Full Pass #1

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Dear Nudgers,

You may recall that I allow myself to “Pass” on a Nudge four times during the year. Usually that means I have pulled something I don’t feel like doing at the moment, or the timing isn’t right, or whatever. I don’t really have to have an excuse. I simply put the original Nudge back in the bowl and draw a new one.

Today I am taking advantage of this rule by taking a Full Pass for the week. Everything’s fine. In fact, everything is better than fine. I’m just exhausted because this happened last weekend:

Meet Bear, the newest member of Pack Woods. Bear is sweet, smart, fun, curious, and challenging. Come to think of it, he is kind of a cuddly and furry embodiment of a Nudge.

So while I rest…hahahahaha…I mean while I devote every drop of my time, energy, and attention to taking care of our little* dude, you can do whatever you wish this week. Pull a Nudge of your own and see it through, or take a breather. Listen to your heart, and do what you need and want to do.

I’ll see you back here next Sunday.

With virtual hugs and wet puppy kisses,

Kathleen

*”Little.” LOL! At four months, Bear weighed in at 32 lbs. Who needs the gym? 😉

Nudging: Take a Mental Health Day

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Backstory: “Oh, SURE!”

That’s what I all-but-yelled when I drew this Nudge a few minutes ago. “Take a Mental Health Day.” Take a day off in one of my busiest weeks ever.

I could take one of the four passes. But how ironic is that?

I looked back at my notes on why I included this on The List 3.0. Here’s what I wrote:

“I’ve been my own boss for over two decades. Taking a ‘sick day’ pretty much doesn’t happen, and ‘paid sick days’, well…. I even work weekends once in a while. Also, when I scheduled my COVID booster shot last fall, I found myself looking forward to the time I would ‘get’ to take off to recover. How wrong is that?! I need time to rest and recharge.”

Alright. I accept this Nudge and will give it my best effort.

 

Nudged: Ignore the news for 1 full week

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Backstory: Pretty straightforward this one. By ignoring the news this week, I hope to lower my blood pressure and maybe focus on more joy in the world. Fingers crossed.

What Happened: Well, this was HARD! I jumped right in, committed to sticking to my plan, but “news” is everywhere. Monday morning it distracted me at the gym. (Just try focusing on anything other than the hanging TV screens in front of you while you’re stuck on the elliptical.) And it feels like everything counts as news. Is it okay to check the weather app? (Not if I end up looking at weather-related stories — like power outages and catastrophic flooding.) Does keeping up with posts on Instagram count? (Yes, but some had to be checked for work.) Dang! I found myself looking for loopholes!

When I got stressed, I wanted to “relax” with a “break.” When I got bored, ditto. When friends forwarded interesting articles, I wanted desperately to stay informed and reply with my opinions; instead, I set them aside to look at next week. When “BREAKING NEWS” arrived in my email inbox, I could have given in and gotten my celebrity fix, but I got better at moving it to trash before getting sucked in.

I stuck with it, acknowledging the tug to “just look for a moment” and then pulling myself away. Altogether, I felt I completed this Nudge successfully and…

The Ah-Hahs: It got easier with each new day. The attraction lost its appeal, especially as I started to register how less stressed I was. This is in big part due to my noticing how much time I waste looking at mostly garbage, how much energy I waste getting worked up over all the triggering messages that come my way. This was a great Nudge for Radical Self-Care.

Will I slide back into old bad habits next week? I hope not. I don’t think so. I really do feel better having had this break from the 24/7 news cycle.

Nudged: Invite a potential friend out for a “date”

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Backstory: Maybe it’s all the isolation from COVID, or just the fact that so many of my closest friends live far away. I need new girlfriends. I need someone with whom I can pick up the phone and be spontaneous. And it takes time to find the right matches and nurture these relationships.

But it feels like dating (ugh), and it’s scary and hard! So…I’m nudging myself to make the first move.

What Happened: One of my doctors is super fun. We have great chats when I go in for checkups, and I’ve often thought, if we had met under different circumstances, we would be friends.

I don’t have her personal info, so figuring out how to contact her was interesting. I didn’t want to leave a message on her office voicemail or email, something her staff would screen. Instead, I sent her a handwritten note, marked “Personal,” which basically said what I wrote above then said I’d love the opportunity to get better acquainted, maybe over coffee or lunch.

Honestly, this felt a little icky. But I reminded myself of a conversation I had with a friend years ago, a friend who is a pastor. He shared with me how people put him on kind of a pedestal and were intimidated about inviting him to social gatherings. It was like they thought he was too pious to enjoy it or worried he would be judging them. He’s human too, and he was lonely! With him, I was able to separate the person from the profession, and we became good friends, and I followed up by building friendships with other pastors in my life.

So….I hope my doc accepts my invitation.

Ah-hah: As I write this, I haven’t yet had a response to my note, and I’ve been feeling like a nerdy, needy middle schooler: “Why doesn’t she like me?! What’s wrong with me?!” I admit there was a small part of me that hoped for an immediate and enthusiastic YES!

I’m going to have to be okay with the wait. I’m mostly proud of myself for going waaaay outside my comfort zone and making the ask. Because nothing would happen if I didn’t first ask, and it feels empowering to have taken the first steps.

 

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Nudging: Invite a potential friend out for a “date”

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Backstory: Maybe it’s all the isolation from COVID, or just the fact that so many of my closest friends live far away. I need new girlfriends. I need someone with whom I can pick up the phone and be spontaneous. And it takes time to find the right matches and nurture these relationships.

But it feels like dating (ugh), and it’s scary and hard! So…I’m nudging myself to make the first move.

Nudging: Explore a used-book store, spend just $10

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Backstory: Of all things, this Nudge was inspired by a character in a book I read last year (wish I could remember the title). The character would only read books he could purchase for $5 or less. What an interesting challenge! I also love that this Nudge is a way to support a local small business.

Speaking of great small bookshops, I’d like to give a shout-out to Dudley’s in Bend, Oregon. In their cozy space, they offer new and used books, as well as an espresso bar. This fabulous staircase (pictured) leads to the seating area.

Nudged: Give myself a home facial

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Backstory: This Nudge hits on two themes: self-care and household decluttering. I wish I could go out for a professional facial, but I’m still not comfortable being in enclosed spaces. (Darn COVID.) But that’s no excuse to pass up a chance for some pampering. Besides, I know there’s a treasure trove of potions and creams and stuff hiding in the bottom drawer of my bathroom cabinet. Time to dig something out and put it to use!

Note: Like with all Nudges, you can follow along with mine or do your own thing. Maybe you can splurge for a mani-pedi at your favorite spa—go for it! Maybe you got a fancy gift set of bath bubbles for the holidays—break it out! Treat yourself to something that makes you feel good.

What happened: The directions weren’t specific as to the time—just “Let dry and rinse with warm water”—so I figured I had about 10 minutes. Immediately after I applied the mask and washed the residue off my hands, I started looking for a way to multi-task. I could sort laundry, put the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher, make the bed, check emails, glance at headlines….Whoa.

STOP!

A better choice, I realized, was to sit my butt down and relax for those 10 minutes. Close my eyes, breathe. It was hard, but I did it.

Ah-Hahs: I love how Nudges surprise me, how what I expect to experience goes out the window. I thought this one would be a simple act of self-care. Instead, it was hard for me to do, which was a little disappointing. I did my best, but will admit I was fidgeting and distracted. Which makes me think maybe I need to give myself facials more frequently, for the health of my skin and my soul.

I wish you a happy, healthy, and fun new year! xoKathleen

Nudged: Eliminate (or delegate) a big responsibility

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Backstory: I groaned when I read this Nudge, and I almost put it back for my first Pass. This nudge presents at the start of one of the busiest work weeks for me—oh, plus Christmas. Everything on my massive to-do list is a “MUST-DO”, and at a quick glance, everything in there can only be done by me.

Or…?

My intention to practice more Radical Self-Care is behind this Nudge. When I added it to the List, I set the intention that I would be on the lookout for tasks that suck my time and energy, things I overdo or overthink that ultimately aren’t healthy. I’m not going to drop the ball on taking care of my family, meeting all the tight client deadlines, making sure bills get paid on time, and carve out time for exercise and sleep. At this moment, I honestly don’t know what could be eliminated or delegated, but I am accepting this Nudge and trusting something will come to mind.

What Happened: I mulled this one over throughout Sunday and into Monday. I considered putting off the laundry for a day or two, but then I wouldn’t have clean gym clothes, which means I couldn’t go to the gym, which means I can’t do the exercising that is so important to my well-being. (What was that I said about “overthinking” in the Backstory?)

Mid-morning I got an idea. Instead of heading out for a massive grocery shopping, I would try online ordering and delivery. I haven’t had great luck in the past (the time lettuce was “out of stock” and I had to rush out last minute to another store to get what I needed for that night’s dinner party comes to mind—who runs out of lettuce?!), but maybe everything would fall into place this time. I grabbed my list off the fridge, pulled up the website, and got to work. The ordering part went pretty quickly, and I got a reasonable window for delivery. But then, shortly before delivery I got an email that they were out of two items (and I had requested substitutions!). Fortunately, these were not items I needed right away, but this does mean I’ll have to physically go to the market later this week.

Delegating this task did save me some time, so I’ll call this a win.

Ah-Hahs: Did this save me stress? I’m not really sure how I feel about this nudge, so I allowed myself a little extra time to mull it over. Yes, my choice to hand over this responsibility saved me getting fully dressed and taking time to go to the market and load+unload the car. But some days, the only time I get away from my desk and out of the house is when I run errands like this. (Thanks, COVID.) And I typically enjoy shopping for groceries, seeing what’s in season, getting inspired.

I think what I mostly got out of this is my need to re-stretch my nudging muscles and live into the discomfort that comes when I “give things up” to take better care of myself. This is becoming especially important at work. Do I really have to do it all by myself? What can I delegate? Who can I bring on board my “team”? Is it time to hire a VA?

There are things I can delegate. I just have to get a little creative with it.

Anyone else have an interesting experience with this nudge? Please share in Comments.