Tag Archives: challenge

Nudged: Plant something

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Backstory: Well, crap. This is clearly a Nudge from the original list, before I did some other Nudges that helped me gain clarity on how much I do not like gardening. Isn’t one of the “rules” of nudging that it has to be “fun”?

Ugh.

But…I have been thinking it would be nice to plant a new rose bush in the backyard, to have fresh cut flowers without having to spend the extra money at the market. And the blueberry bushes are thriving, despite lack of attention, so maybe another one would work. Or a new herb plant for the kitchen window?

I am feeling anti-enthusiastic about this week’s task. But I drew it, so I must do it.

What Happened: I spent much of this week looking for ways to wiggle out of this. I mean, really. I had no desire to go to the garden center, pick something out, and dig in the dirt just to check this off. Maybe I could get “creative” about this one. Maybe I could “plant my feet” into some intention? Maybe I could use my last “pass” and choose another Nudge for the week? (Although by the time I thought of this, much of the week had gone by.) I even considered fudging about completing it, which is 100% in opposition to what this 52Nudges experience is about.

This morning this Nudge continued to hang over my head, taking up mental space as I worked, ran laundry, and tried to distract myself with busyness. I really don’t want to do any gardening. The thought of wandering the garden center for inspiration doesn’t elicit any good feelings from me. But what “seed” might I “plant”?

Ah. Hah.

On my to do list is visiting my oldest friend. After her family moved out of state when I was eight, we became pen pals, and we continue to keep in close touch via letters, emails, and now text messages. We’ve also managed to get together in person several times over the decades. The last visit was for my wedding, coming on eight years ago. I want to see her. I want to spend time in her company. I want to reminisce and catch up and share and dream. I want to do all of this before it’s “too late”.

I don’t know where the money or the time will come from, since both right now are committed to other things. But…I can plant the seeds and make my intention to do this known.

So I called my travel agent and asked her to keep an eye out for screaming deals on airfare.

And I texted my friend and asked her when would be the best times of year to come for a visit.

I don’t know how or when I’ll do this, it might even have to wait till next year, but I feel encouraged that the intention is now in motion.

The Ah-Hahs: That line about “Maybe I could get ‘creative’ about this one.” I just laughed (with delight) at myself. I started out dreading this Nudge, then found a way to have it help me manifest something I really want to do.

How fun and amazing is that?

 

Nudging: Wear a different hat x4

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Backstory: What makes me feel comfortable, feel good, feel like me? I’ve amassed quite a collection of hats over the years, from travels and gifts and some spontaneous as well as thoughtful purchases. Yet I’ve noticed recently that I gravitate to the same few over and over. So this Nudge is part closet purging and part getting clear on what feels right for me.

P.S. For you maybe it’s shoes or sweaters or jewelry (see the “Wear the nice jewelry” post from last year for motivation). Set aside some time this week to experiment and figure out what’s right for you.

Nudging: Do something that scares me

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Backstory: I was just thinking about this Nudge. I knew it was on the list, and as my collection in the bowl dwindles, I knew it had to pop up soon.

So here it is. What might I do this week? What scares me? Maybe this is the week I finally…

  • schedule my annual mammogram (the last one resulted in surgery—I’m fine, by the way—so dreading this, though I know it’s necessary).
  • track down and contact the holders of the copyright on some song lyrics I’d like to use in a book I’m writing (worst case scenario: they could say no—which would completely foul things up for me).
  • trust my gut and tell a needy, demanding, and annoying potential client that I really do NOT want to work with her (despite needing the income).
  • say “Oh, hell no!” to everyone else who wants free work/favors/my time/my energy and turn my full focus to work that truly makes me happy, that gives me energy, that gives me joy.
  • decide where I want my ashes to be scattered.

What scares you (and what are you going to do about it)? Good luck!

Nudging: Clear off dresser top; end of week, redo

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Backstory: It’s not the worst hot spot in the house, but as I take in what’s there—what has been sitting there for years—I’m ashamed. Photos of cute toddlers (who are now teenagers with driver’s licenses), old CDs that have lost their cases (can’t recall the last time I listened to them), favorite items of jewelry that need repair (and so have been unworn and unappreciated), Mardi Gras beads…Mardi Gras beads? Really?

Nudging: Clean out a drawer

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Backstory: This is part of my ongoing efforts to get rid of clutter, to open up some space and allow more light and breath into my life.

Earlier this week I caught up with my mom. After she gave me updates on various family members and we talked through possible plans for the December holidays, she shared with me what she had planned for her day: “Going through piles, reading the to do list, updating the to do list, sending recipes to friends, going through recipes and setting them aside because I’ll make them some day….”

And I saw my future.

I’m not sharing this with you to in any way dis my mom. But, honestly, I do not want to be looking at the same to do list 30 years from now. I do not want to be spending my golden years sorting through all the stuff and files and papers and projects I’ll get to “some day”.

In fact, I don’t want to be dealing with all this accumulated junk two years from now. So I’m starting somewhere.

 

P.S. This Tuesday, November 6, is Election Day here in the United States. If you haven’t already sent in your absentee ballot, please consider this your nudge to VOTE!

Nudged: Submit an essay/pitch for publication

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Backstory: This is one of the hardest parts of my work. You send out something you’ve crafted, something you’ve nurtured and cried over and sweated through, and you hope-hope-hope someone LOVES IT and wants to help you share it with the world. And if you’re lucky, they’ll also want to pay you for the privilege.

I’ve gotten out of the habit of pitching lately. It is a tremendous amount of work and can be incredibly discouraging. But, if I’m not putting my work out there, it can’t be picked up, and it won’t ever be read.

So this week I’m going to take a look at what’s in my circulation file and put myself out there again.

How might you Nudge yourself out of your professional comfort zone this week? Is it time to update your LinkedIn profile? Apply online to an open position? Make some calls and do some networking?

Do it.

What Happened: Two pieces were on my mind, and I began the week with the intention of pitching them both to two separate entities. Both are of a personal nature, so both involve not only putting my writing work on the line, but also my small vulnerable human ego.

I sent out one, pitching a story for a live-reading event. And it was accepted—wahoo!

I had every intention of polishing the pitch for the second piece, researching publications, and sending it out to an editor, but work and life got in the way (yes, and being a chicken), and it didn’t happen.

One of my many repositories for ideas, pitches, works-in-progress. Sheesh.

I’m thinking this Nudge needs to return to the bowl for a second attempt.

The Ah-Hahs: Believe in my gifts and my work. Take risks. Be fearless!

Nudged: Go to the gym 3x

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Backstory: This was a drop-in, you won’t find it on the List. Here’s what happened:

My darling husband, Thor (the name he picked for himself for when he’s mentioned here), has been checking every Sunday to hear about what I’ve done and what I’ve drawn for the coming week. He’s made some excellent suggestions along the way, and helped me to rehash and reevaluate post-Nudge thoughts. A few times I’ve asked if he’s wanted to do the Nudge with me, but he’s always declined. Up till this week.

We’ve both been super-busy with work commitments, with additional events happening after hours and on weekends. It’s a lot. And lately I’ve found our daily check-in conversation goes something like this:

Venus: How was your day?

Mars: Fine.

Venus: How are you?

Mars: Fine.

Venus: What’s on your mind?

Mars: Nothing.

So yesterday we took Louie the dog out for a long walk and caught up. After our usual check-ins (see above), he shared with me that he’s dragging around the weight of not knowing what he wants to do with the last half of his life, a dilemma I can certainly relate to. Many of our friends are retiring from careers and now have time to pursue long-time passions and hobbies. What might ours be? We’ve talked about signing up for classes, brainstorming, getting creative about figuring this out…. No surprise, to him (to many of us) the prospect of figuring out The Rest of Our Lives is overwhelming.

I shared with him the questions Saeeda shared with me during our interview a couple of months ago (read it here): Not “What do you want to do?” in life, but “How do you want to feel?” There are no right/wrong answers, I said to Thor. “You can pick intellectually challenged, silly, strong, relaxed, content, intrigued, entertained…let’s start with how you’d like to feel and we’ll figure out the doing part later.”

Over brunch I suggested we brainstorm some ideas for this. Not happening. Okay. But mid-afternoon he told me he’d decided his Nudge for this week would be “Go to the gym 3 times.” Perfect.

I will be doing this Nudge with him. It’s my hope that we’ll go to the gym together on some, if not all, outings, but since he likes to get up at 4:00 am (and I, well, don’t), we’ll see how it goes.

As we head into this week, I’m thinking about how having someone as an accountability partner can nudge us a little further. Or it can simply make it more fun. If you don’t have a spouse or significant other, think about asking a friend to join you in a Nudge. If that doesn’t feel comfortable to you, then consider making me your partner. Share your chosen Nudge for the week, update me in comments, and at the end of the week, let me know how you did. Let’s encourage each other to fuller lives.

What Happened: Monday morning, 4:55 am: “Kath. It’s time.”

My darling likes to get up at 4:00 am on weekdays, have his coffee, watch the news, clean the kitchen (I told you he’s a gem), then be at the gym when they open their doors at 5:00 sharp. I aspire to this, but my days are really really long and I get really really tired. I begged off on this first day. However, a couple of hours later, when my to do list threatened to consume all of today and tomorrow, I remembered my commitment to this Nudge and got myself out the door. Got my workout in and checked off the first of three days. Yay!

Tuesday morning I was up and dressed before Thor gave me my five-minute warning. We got to the gym, got in our workouts, and got our days started. Wahoo!

Wednesday: I don’t know if this is allergies or a cold or my body just crying uncle. I’m out. Thor had an especially long day ahead, so he went into the office to prep early. There’s still time to do this.

Thursday, Friday, Saturday…(see “Wednesday”).

The Ah-Ha: You know, “best laid plans” and all. We both got two outta three, and I’ll take it. It was fun to come up with this idea and pursue it together, and I’m proud of us for giving this a shot.

I also realize this whole creative Nudging adventure is not really Thor’s thing, and I won’t push him to actively participate with me each week, but I do hope we’ll figure out other Nudges we can do together.

I asked Thor for his ah-hah on his first full Nudging experience and got, “It was fine.”

I’m good with that.

What greeted me at 5:00 am 🙂

 

Nudging: Go to the gym 3x

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Backstory: This was a drop-in, you won’t find it on the List. Here’s what happened:

My darling husband, Thor (the name he picked for himself for when he’s mentioned here), has been checking every Sunday to hear about what I’ve done and what I’ve drawn for the coming week. He’s made some excellent suggestions along the way, and helped me to rehash and reevaluate post-Nudge thoughts. A few times I’ve asked if he’s wanted to do the Nudge with me, but he’s always declined. Up till this week.

We’ve both been super-busy with work commitments, with additional events happening after hours and on weekends. It’s a lot. And lately I’ve found our daily check-in conversation goes something like this:

Venus: How was your day?

Mars: Fine.

Venus: How are you?

Mars: Fine.

Venus: What’s on your mind?

Mars: Nothing.

So yesterday we took Louie the dog out for a long walk and caught up. After our usual check-ins (see above), he shared with me that he’s dragging around the weight of not knowing what he wants to do with the last half of his life, a dilemma I can certainly relate to. Many of our friends are retiring from careers and now have time to pursue long-time passions and hobbies. What might ours be? We’ve talked about signing up for classes, brainstorming, getting creative about figuring this out…. No surprise, to him (to many of us) the prospect of figuring out The Rest of Our Lives is overwhelming.

I shared with him the questions Saeeda shared with me during our interview a couple of months ago (read it here): Not “What do you want to do?” in life, but “How do you want to feel?” There are no right/wrong answers, I said to Thor. “You can pick intellectually challenged, silly, strong, relaxed, content, intrigued, entertained…let’s start with how you’d like to feel and we’ll figure out the doing part later.”

Over brunch I suggested we brainstorm some ideas for this. Not happening. Okay. But mid-afternoon he told me he’d decided his Nudge for this week would be “Go to the gym 3 times.” Perfect.

I will be doing this Nudge with him. It’s my hope that we’ll go to the gym together on some, if not all, outings, but since he likes to get up at 4:00 am (and I, well, don’t), we’ll see how it goes.

As we head into this week, I’m thinking about how having someone as an accountability partner can nudge us a little further. Or it can simply make it more fun. If you don’t have a spouse or significant other, think about asking a friend to join you in a Nudge. If that doesn’t feel comfortable to you, then consider making me your partner. Share your chosen Nudge for the week, update me in comments, and at the end of the week, let me know how you did. Let’s encourage each other to fuller lives.

Nudging: Get 8 hours of sleep every night

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Backstory: Well, um, I need to get more and better sleep.

I keep hearing about how lack of sleep effects everything, including my ability to lose weight. I know I need to be better about this, but it always seems to be the easiest thing to cut when deadlines and to do lists and responsibilities are hanging over me.

It’s no coincidence that I recently finished reading the August issue of National Geographic, for which the theme is “The Science of Sleep.”

Did you know “anyone who regularly sleeps less than six hours has a higher risk of depression, psychosis, stroke, and obesity”?

Yikes.

So this week I’m going to walk away from the office, turn off the TV, ignore the phone, and catch some extra zzzzzs.

 

P.S. For inspiration and motivation, I recommend you read the book Thrive by Arianna Huffington. No spoilers, but she got a “wake-up call” when sleep deprivation became a real problem from her—then she took the steps to make a good night’s sleep a priority in her life.

Nudging: Say “No” to something

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Backstory: It was just a few months ago that I shared my experience of “The gift of saying ‘No (thank you).’” (Read the original 52+ post here). Even though I know the benefits of this Nudge, I’m still a little nervous. What if nothing happens this week? What if I can’t say “no” to anything? What if I get tangled up in all the shoulds?

So this week’s Nudge is one of those leap-of-faith things in which I trust the answers and direction will come.